Just another day at the beginning of the holiday

The holidays have just started, and with some headstress I just had to leave home for a few days.
Alot has been going on latey and I haven't been all good to writeit into my dairy every end of the week;-)
The most terrible happening these few weeks was the death of poor Michael Jackson.
It was so unexpected, and at such a young age of only 50.
Too, young, just too young!
So there I was listening to all the songs on the tv.
All the famous ones, and the classic's too, like Thriller and so on.
The memorial send off was the day before yesterday, whilst I was on the train on my way to Germany.
My Aunt had finally given birth to her baby daughter, whom I'd of loved to see.
Sadly the contact was quite weak, due to all the stress of baby, family and so on.
So the phone was kept off.
Shame, instead I came to my family in Gerderath; Aunty Juliane, Uncle Ian, and cousin Mellissa.
It was a very last minute notice in comming over, I believe I called round about 5.
My train was to leave at 19 minutes past 7, therefore arriving at half past 9 in the evening in Roermond.
So it's the summer holidays now, and I thought my OV had run out already I bought myself a ticket, though finding out a little later from the train conducter that I could still use the OV, thatr it only runs oout on the 16th.
-_- My was I fooled!
I certainly helps reading what it says on the back of the OV card XD
So you have these fooled moments once every while, very normal, but there did go my 14,40 euro.
What have I been up to?
Not too much, jsut taking it easy, and catching up on some lovely sleep, and spending some time with the family.
What can be better than that?
From what I recalled today, was that yesterday was mine and Stefan's 8 month.
I sent him a message congradulating him, and that I loved him much!
Oh, live right now, it good, though there are too many things going through my mind which I wish didn't.
The past really gets in the way, and jsut bloks your way in going forwards.
This thing came up again which jsut shocked me, and I jsut told myself, it's in the past,and it'S all different now.
I keep telling myself this, but somehow, it keeps siving though like a gigantic sive that had been tried to be fixed by bloking up the holes.
It's like I have two different sides, the side thats very calm and forging and jsut thinks straight, and the other an overreaction of emotion.
It's terrible, one moment all calm and the next 7.8 on the rikter scale.
My new method now, when I hear something that would irritant me, worry me or evern shock me and make me sad and therefore angry, I would then just shut my eyes, breathe in and out deeply and jsut take a few seconds to think about it, and then react to what has been said to me.
It's still a little difficult,but I'm trying my best.
Maybe I'm just so worried about my friends and the stupid things they can do that I can't relax properly myself ;-p

One cool things I can tell you is that I finally don't have to sleep on the floor anymore! :D
Yes you've guessed it, I have myself a new bed!
But the coolest thing was that I got it for free!
With the help of Stefan of course.
We were first picking up a new sofa for my room there when we drove past the Ikea when I mentioned the bed.
The man had then remembered that just the day before he bought a bed to the kringloop.
We could try to get it back.
And indeed we did!
Quite an adventure!
We straypainted it in the end.
Because it was a bluey colour, and black fitted better to my bedroom colours.

Well tomorrow is the last day of my stay here in Germany.
I'll be leaving between 3 and 4 in the afternoon, adn should be home about 6 ish.
To find me falling, once again, into Stefan's arms!

Waiting can be sooo deadly!

It's been about 1 and a half day since our last seeing (mine and Stefan's) and I'm dreading it already!
Well dreading it, hmm, maybe in other words;...I'm missing him very much.
Saturday was supposed to be 6 months together, untill I realised, when I overlooked the calender, I was once wrong again and that it was 7 months instead.
Very typical of me.
I, at times, can be so simple.
Anyways, 7 months that's a big thing, to be celebrating.
Seeing we didn't really celebrate it the month before( this was becasue I jsut came out of the operation room; hevn't gotten my tonsils taken out) we're up to much this weekend.
There is a suprise waiting for me saturday:)
The only words were to get dressed up warm, and to bring the blanket again.
So I'm very much looking forward to it.

*tum tum tum, tralala*
*Thinking into space*


You know what I'm think about right now?
That I still have to clean my room, and I'm quite looking forward to dinner.
I wonder what we'll be having.
Yesterday I started making my own dress, due to the occation saturday, I want to suprise him with this new look of mine.
It's a silver skirt with a black petticoat underneath, and the top is black.
I'll be wearing it with black tights, a black jacket and in my hands a cute bush of three roses.
It excites me to excite him.
I cannot wait to behold the loving smile of his face, when he sees me.:)
***************************************************************
On saturday the 6th of June
Is the day of all days,
the day we vowed to be one, exactly 7 months ago,
And for this day of all days will be sunniest and happiest of all the normal week days,
On the friday around about 8 you shall behold her.
Comming toward you as a distant speck,
From far you can already see there's something special about her,
She shinners through the streetlamp lit light,
Her gown glisening,
The closer she comes,
the more beauty she beares upon ones eyes
and with her red lips kissing yours ever so gently,
she embraces you with her eternal love,
*****************************************************************


Wait for me my love, there is jsut one more day!
And one last chance to miss one another!

Someones Gotta Start Somewhere!

I guess theres's a first time for everyone!
Everyone starts out a beginner.
Wether it's starting to play the guitare or reading that one book you bought last week and thought you'd actually read it for real this time.
Then again the attempt is always important, the idea the wanting to do it.
Wether you do it or not is baisically your own decision.
So I'm hoping, this time, I'm actually going to keep my own head promises and turn them into some good motivated creations!
So I guess after all this I should kinda start to introduce myself.
Not meaning to to be rude at all;-)
The names Cat, CAth, Mcduff or lets just be easy and old fashioned( which I prefere best) call me Catherine.
I'm round about 18 and a half now, just to check the calender, it's another 4 months till the terrible...19!
Geez I'm getting old!
Hmm, well it's not too bad, alot of positive things started to happen around that age(18)!:D
One of the most important was that I found the love of my life!
And I mean what can get better than that?
Well than winning 12 million or becomming a famous superstar all of a sudden.
But I got to admit it's a great feeling!
Being in love, the sickness no ones can really explain, I kinda know why that is so.
I mean when I see my love I get all giddy and d%$^%EFjkdjhdkfhsdfhd and then hdskhsdd$%fdsaf3$#@!
I'm so overjoyed and then my heart does 20 saltoes in 5 seconds, it's so breath taking!
See, it just....can't be explained!

But yea more about that later;-)
So a little more about myself:
There's a lot to say about this one person!
One thing for sure, she doesn't know what she's doing!
One moment this the other that, can't make up ones mind, twisted into a knot!
She'll do one thing, the next moment something else!
Interests reaching out for and wide, every conversation filled with a million worlds full of inspiration.
At times, nothing too special lingers upon ones mind, sticking a finger into ones nose.
So come and dare have a peek, and I might think of joining too.
Far across a distant mountain you have her staring into an empty ocean, or a starry sky at night.
Make a wish to a falling star.
It might be an inspiration of one of a kind??

I really dig to write little things likes that, thats one reason I added myself to thi blog thing, to ease myself of all my creative-informational needs of my life!

So hope you enjoy every blog that's to be written here be me ;-)